Updated w/ Podcast on Feb 8, 2012 @ 7PM PST: Warning: Adult/Parental discretion advised. This show will not air on Radio Javan, however, since sex is an important topic that’s seldom talked about in our families and even relationships, we had to do it anyway.
S-E-X. From the moment we are born, our parents take a vow of celibacy (not for themselves, but for US). Even the topic of sex is forbidden. At least for some Iranian families, including mine.
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In fact, I didn’t even know what sex was until one of our family friends (their son) explained it to me in the seventh grade. Until then, I thought babies came from lovingly holding hands– okay okay, not really. But you get the idea, I knew sex was SOMETHING, but I thought it was something BAD, which is completely untrue.
I was always so clueless about sex and as a result, I was forced to learn everything on my own. I listened to the stories without trying to get too horrified of the idea that a boy and a girl could do something like THAT. And what is worst, I felt this intensely guilty every time my curiosity took control and coaxed me into learning more.
Why is it that SOME of our parents feel the need to shelter us? Is that really so healthy? I will admit, I do miss believing in the idea that a stork will bring me my babies… because let’s be honest, childbirth is truly terrifying. But, worse than sheltering is painting a negative image around sex. Arash, an Iranican listener, mentioned in his comment that his parents left the room when a sex scenes appeared on TV, I think Arash had it much better, because my parents not only shut if off, but explicitly showed disgust and anger toward it, and that reaction is now part of my subconsciousness. I’m almost ashamed of my sexuality, and it has made it difficult for me to openly learn, and communicate about sex, even with my partner. I’ll keep working on this, but we made this show to make it easier for you too. EDUCATION and knowledge is power- as Iranians we pride ourselves in our culture. But why is it that we are forbidden from educating ourselves when it comes to sex? What makes it so taboo?
Experts in this field encouraged us to have this discussion about sex in an open, safe, and non-judgmental environment as the issue becomes oppressive and toxic when it’s not talked about. Healthy sexuality involves partners talking/communicating and making a mutual decision. It’s not like the movies where the couple just jump in, and when it happens is magical! In the show we talk about getting educated about sex, and here’s two links recommended by the experts we contacted: Columbia University Sex Health, Coalition for Positive Sexuality
Join our co-hosts as they ignore their parent’s rules and discuss whether their sheltered childhood away from sex really benefited them. Did it benefit you? Doosetoon Daram! – Undisclosed Author
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March 7, 2012
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